Most bizarre crackering situation

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Most bizarre crackering situation

Postby Waitingforbaby#1 » Apr 21, 2014 12:57 pm

Hi all,
I'm new to this site, new to HG, new to pregnancy! I just wanted to share what happened to me yesterday (on Easter no less) because there's no one in my life who could possibly understand how awful it was besides you wonderful gals.

A little back story: my husband is from Albania and his parents are retired, still living there, and don't speak English. They had booked a trip to visit us for two weeks way back in January before I even got pregnant. Today is their last day of their two week stay. I am 13 weeks currently and for the first week of their stay, I didn't know I had HG, but just thought I had really bad morning sickness that was maybe hopefully starting to taper off (I was still nauseous 24/7 but had dropped to only vomiting 1-2x a day, and it was the end of the first trimester, after all!). A couple days after I hit 12 weeks I went to the hospital for an IV because I couldn't keep anything down. That's when I found out I have HG.

So, after watching me suffer at home on bedrest all week barely able to move around the house or eat anything, vomiting 4x a day (only 4, I feel very lucky), I had hoped they understood how bad I had it, since I couldn't really communicate with them through words. My FIL is a retired family doctor and my MIL got very sick with her third pregnancy and was on bedrest for two weeks. I was so pleased we made it all week without them doing more than offering to get any food I could eat or trying to make sure I was always wearing socks. Then Sunday I was laying in the couch, struggling to finish a banana and my FIL starts telling my husband to translate some medical advice for me. He explained how I needed nutrients and exercise and at first I just tried to listen politely while my husband translated and offer a weak smile in the direction of my FIL through the nausea and extreme weakness and fatigue (id list 7 lbs just that week). Then, I heard the following words come from my husband's mouth: "I know you think you can't eat or exercise right now, but it's. Just psychological and you have to get over that. Being a mother is about sacrificing for your baby and you have to start doing that right now by forcing yourself to eat, even if it makes you throw up." I could see my husband hating translating this as he watched my face sink because he's the only one who understands how much I hate it when people tell me this is all in my head. I tried really hard to keep it together but I got so upset I started crying, which I hated myself for because then my poor husband had to translate why I was upset, and their apologies, and my apologies. It was horrible and I had to sit there and say I understood they were trying to help when I just wanted to go in my room an be alone and cry. They are really sweet people and I love them to death, but the last thing I wanted was for them to spend two weeks with us and leave thinking their daughter in law is a wimp who doesn't sacrifice enough for her baby.

sorry, this was long, but I needed to get it out.
Sincerely,

Waitingforbaby#1

Miscarriage @ 7 or 8 weeks, 9/14/13- no nausea or HG
Baby #1 due 10/26/14- diagnosed with HG @ 12 wks, severe NVP or mild HG? 6-12 wks
Waitingforbaby#1
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Re: Most bizarre crackering situation

Postby earthmama » Apr 25, 2014 8:06 pm

I am so so sorry you are suffering like this in general and then to have anyone tell you that it's just in your head - so terrible! I hope your husband cam stand up for you - you need to be cared for and loved not questioned right now. Sending love!
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Re: Most bizarre crackering situation

Postby BoBaby » May 05, 2014 10:30 pm

How awful. Thank goodness your husband gets it. Mine didn't last time. Wish we could explain to the world that this is not psychological. Unfortunately many doctors were taught that, including me in 1997 so I'm guessing that was part of your FILs training also.

Hang in there. Hope it really does lift soon.
DS 2011- HG- B6/Doxylamine/Zofran/Phenergan IV fluids, vomited to 26 weeks, nauseated to 41. Very healthy baby.
Pregnant again April 2014. Hoping early aggressive treatment helps.
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